What did I do to deserve this?
Not a thing. As I am pulling into my driveway, I see that you are in your car waiting for me with "that look." My heart jumps into my throat and I start shaking, even though I know I have not done anything wrong. You are 40 minutes early. I get out of the car and you get out of yours, dashing over to confront me. "Where were you?" You yell. I softly explain that I had a quick errand to run. You slap me upside the head for not being quick enough. For tucking my shirt in so that others could see my figure. You slap me until I fall down, and then you start kicking me with those steel toe boots I have come to know so well. I beg and plead with you to stop. You do, but each time is more severe than the last.
I spent 4 years thinking that things would get better. The above mini story is just a sampling of what I went through daily. I have been beaten, raped, verbally abused, forced into a chilly lake for 2 hours until I had frostbite, made to pee in a cup because he wouldn't stop at a rest area, and choked me for joking with a family member at the grocery store.
I went to school with bruises and my arm in a brace. I told people that I was very clumsy. Funny how once I left I no longer "ran into walls", I no longer "bruised easliy". Thanks to what happened though, I am afraid of the night, breathing on my neck, and sudden movements.
I now enjoy life and have tons of confidence, where with you there was none. I am a worthwhile human being with feelings and needs. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to feel loved.
Fortunately when I broke up with my ex I had my mom there, so he couldn't hurt me. I told him that I had had enough and that it was not going to work out. There were no kids involved. Today, 10 years later I am a confident, attractive lady who has a great job in management and a wonderful daughter. May she never know what happened. I am teaching her every day to be a confident, well adjusted person. To all of you out there that are still being abused, GET OUT!! You are important!! Make sure you have everything in order before you leave. If you have kids, call their school and give them a heads up as to what is happening. They'll work with you. A very good book to read is called "Uncharged Battery" By Edra Blixseth. You deserve to be happy and loved.
Thank you for reading my story. God Bless.
32, USA
Special Quote: You're never alone.
next page